No Milk
Q: How did the cow feel when it could not give any more milk?
A: Like an udder failure.
Needing Glasses
The muddled old gentleman went up to another man at the conference. “I hardly recognized you,” he said. “You’ve changed so much: your hair is different, you seem shorter, you’ve done away with your glasses. What’s happened to you Mr. Frost?”
“But I’m not Mr. Frost.”
“Amazing—you’ve even changed your name!
New York tourist
A tourist visiting New York saw a restaurant which claimed it could supply any dish ordered, so he asked the waiter for kangaroo on toast. After a while the waiter came back and said, “I’m so sorry, sir, but we’ve run out of bread.”
North Pole Chicken
Q: What do you call a chicken at the North Pole?
A: Lost
Niagara Falls
A guide was showing Niagara Falls to
a man from Texas.
Guide: I’ll bet you don’t have anything
like this in Texas.
Texan: Nope, but in Texas we have plumbers who can fix it.
Needles
Q: What kind of pine has the sharpest
needles?
A: A porcupine.
